Wednesday, November 12, 2008

One Thing I Was Made For

note: I know that is not proper English, but that is how the questioned was asked: What's one thing God has made you for?

My wife.

My destiny is accomplished in serving her destiny and the destinies of my children.

25 For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her 26 to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word.27 He did this to present her to himself as a glorious church without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish. Instead, she will be holy and without fault. 28 In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself. 29 No one hates his own body but feeds and cares for it, just as Christ cares for the church. 30 And we are members of his body. 31 As the Scriptures say, “A man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.” 32 This is a great mystery, but it is an illustration of the way Christ and the church are one. 33 So again I say, each man must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. - Ephesians 5:25-33 (NLT)

The cleansing of the woman comes from the death of the man. That sentence is in my notes from the men's retreat. What really does that mean? Well, the husband is to love his wife like Christ loves the church. Christ loved the church so much, he gave his life for it. I am to die for my wife as well. Daily. Put aside my own feelings and comfort and serve my wife's purpose and destiny. Christ was (and is) so deeply in love with the church (his people - not any building) that it cost him his life - a great expense. Another note from my um, notes: deeply in love at my expense. My wife needs to know that I love her and that I would do anything for her. I'd fight for her and die for her. I've got to live for her. I think of the Bryan Adams song, "(Every Thing I Do) I Do It For You".

Husbands are to love their wives as Christ loves the church. This is an all out, unselfish, fully committed, undying, unconditional love. He loved the church so much he died for her. He sacrificed for her. So, how do I sacrifice for my wife? The best way to do this is to ask her. "Babe (or Honey, Sweetheart, Pookie, Wife, Woman, Love of my life, Dear, Baby, Sweet potato pie, or any other affectionate name you have for your wife), how can I serve you? How can I help you to be the woman/mother/wife you want to be - that God has designed you to be?" This may take actually talking to your wife. Once she recovers from falling over, you may have to spend some time in prayer with her. Look out, because all this could lead to her fulfilling the scriptures that are written before the above passage:

21 And further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. 22 For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23 For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of his body, the church. 24 As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything. - Ephesians 5:21-24 (NLT)

It starts with the husband. The church didn't submit to Christ first. Christ loved the church and gave himself for her first, then the church's response to that is to submit to him. It's a whole lot easier for a wife to submit to a husband she knows loves her more than anything and seeks to serve her above himself. Now, our fleshly side says that it would be easier to love a wife that's more willing to submit to her husband, but that's not how it works. We love Christ because because he first loved us. The church isn't easy to love, either, you know. She can be short-memoried, ungrateful, selfish, nagging, whining, disloyal, and down right rejecting at times, but Christ loves her. We must take our cue from him.

Listen, you start talking and praying with your wife, doing the dishes without being asked, giving her time alone away from the kids, taking out the trash without being asked, picking up your dirty clothes, and other non-selfish things, then you will find a woman more than willing to submit to you. Reminds me of an episode of "Everybody Loves Raymond" when Ray was vacuuming some drapes and Debra walks up behind him and says, "You have never been more attractive to me."

In attempting to do this, I have discovered just how selfish I have been around the house. I have found that I pout a lot if I don't really get what I want. I dare say that you will, too. But, pouting is not the way of a son of God. A son of God is loving, generous, and unselfish. Pouting does not fit that description.

Wow. Well. What was going to be a simple little post has turned into a 30 minute lecture on husbands and wives. I started this thing back on Oct. 31st. Oh, well. Bridget, I love you, and God has made me for you. Husbands, you were made for your wife. Let her know that. Be encouraged.

Soli Deo Gloria

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