iLog 2009: Days 24 & 25

Day 24: Tuesday
The day started out as usual and ended deep in thought. I honestly don't remember how or why it ended there. I remember thinking that night, "why am I so thoughtful?" I don't remember any conversations or events that would have caused me to be so reflective, but there I was, late at night,...reflective.

We had dinner next door at my parents' house, because my mom is out of town and my dad, not wanting to be a bother, won't ever eat with us unless we tie him up and sit him down to eat. So, we did. And he liked it! (Didn't you?)

Yes, that paragraph revealed something interesting, didn't it? I live right next door to my parents. They live in the same house in which I grew up, and now my family and I live next door. Very cool. Many benefits: free babysitting, pool, cable TV, fun (and sometimes free) meals. This could go on and on. I'm just thankful (as is my wife) that my mom is unlike poor Ray Barone's mom on "Everybody Loves Raymond." I don't think we would've lasted too long had that been the case. Thanks, family, for loving and supporting us the way you do. We love you guys!

Day 25: Wednesday
OK, sappiness over, let's continue. I wrote this in my journal at 4:23 in the morning:

I am deep in thought. I have been since last night. At least, that's the best way for me to describe it. I do not feel sad; I do not feel depressed; I just feel ponderous. (side note: 2Nu song, anybody? Anybody?) I feel like the Holy Spirit is wanting to touch me - move me in some way, but am I hindering it? Oh, God, no! I don't wish to hinder Your spirit's move in my life. - Please, speak to me, Lord, for your child is
here, listening.
- I have read 2 Chronicles 13 & 14 and John 9:13-10:21
- Those who obey the Lord find peace. Obedience leads to peace - not necessarily with our enemies, but peace with God. Oh, Lord, teach me that I may obey your commands.

The two words I got out of this morning were "obey" and "peace". Cool. I encourage you to read those passages to see what the Lord may have for you. Be encouraged.

Soli Deo Gloria

iLog 2009: Day 22 Addendum

Sunday:
We had some friends come over for lunch, because re:Think's wife had a dream she wanted to visit about with us. So, as we are eating spaghetti, she explains her dream. I'll let her tell you, so, I'm sorry, you will not hear it here. This isn't about that.

After her dream explanation, re:Think, the husband, describes a dream he had the same night. They were similar but different, and I'll let you hear it from him. This isn't about that, either.

So, Bridget starts to tell about a dream she had Saturday night as well. Since this isn't about that either, she'll have to tell you about it. All three of them sat at our table and were just so smug and "la-dee-da" about how spiritual they were that they all had a dream and I didn't. Well, that's not exactly the case. I would've shared my dream with them, but I decided to let them bask in their "spiritual superiority". (please hear the tongue in cheek here)

This is about MY dream.

I actually had three distinct dreams Saturday night, but only one do I remember in detail. Obviously, this is the dream that I shall depict for you. Actually, I need to start a couple of nights earlier, so let me esplain. No, there is too much. Let me sum up.

Bridget had an episode where she rebuked fear and immediately I hid under the covers. Apparently, fear didn't leave without one more jab, but this one was aimed at me. Fair enough, I got over it. Bridget still teases me.

So, fear comes back Saturday night. I can tell because my dream is odd and weird, and not scary, but I remember feeling afraid. I kept stabbing this seemingly nice guy who was meaning to do us harm, but he was not affected by my efforts. I end up in that half asleep/half awake state and realize that it is only a dream. Thoughts of rebuking this fear came to mind, but I was tired and really didn't want to mess with it. So, I laid there for a few minutes in this odd state of being afraid, but not really, being asleep, but not really. Doesn't make much sense, I know, but how often can one clearly describe one's dreams to other people?

Finally, something happened, I don't remember what, and I decided to take action. However, for whatever reason, I decided to bind fear. I bound fear's mouth, arms, and legs to where fear couldn't do anything but be bound in the name of Jesus Christ. I rolled over and started a different, less fearful, dream.

I find it interesting that we all had dreams of some sort of significance Saturday night. I find it funny that I had three dreams while everyone else only had one. Ha. So, to not let pride take over any more than it already has, I digress.

Be encouraged. Rebuke and bind fear in the name of Jesus. You'll sleep better.

iLog 2009: Days 19 - 23

Day 19: Thursday
A Story: Nikola Tesla visited Henry Ford at his factory, which was having some kind of difficulty. Ford asked Tesla if he could help identify the problem area. Tesla walked up to a wall of boilerplates and made a small X in chalk on one of the plates. Ford was thrilled, and told him to send an invoice.
The bill, for $10,000, arrived. Ford asked for a breakdown. Tesla sent another invoice which read: "marking a small X in chalk = $1; knowing where to put the X = $9,999".

A Testimony: Eddie and Joan paid me cash for helping with their recording software yesterday. I felt that what they paid was a little excessive, and spoke with Joan this morning about it. She simply stated it was for knowing where to put the X.

A Blessing: I went to get my guitar out of the shop today, because it needed some work. The charge was 61 cents less than what Joan paid me yesterday. I was able to pay cash for my guitar and not use our checking account. God knew what he was doing.

A Job Offer: For the last several months, a local U.S. Cellular store, Cellular Plus, has been having remote broadcasts at least once a month with our radio stations. I have been the one to actually broadcast from the store, and so I've come to know the crew there pretty well. At the last remote, I had mentioned how I had gone to part time at the station.
Today, the store manager called me, out of the blue, and offered me a part time job with the store. I was in awe; I was flattered; I was humbled. She told me a little bit about it and set up a time for me to come in tomorrow and visit with them about it. Ok. What's up, God?

Day 20: Friday
Bridget and the fam took BoBo to meet her parents, Tam-Tam and Grandpa, in Lawton, so he can stay the weekend with them in Chickasha. He is very excited.
I went in to visit with the "powers that be" at Cellular Plus, and the deal sounds pretty sweet. Flexible hours, base hourly rate that would go up in 6 months plus commissions on contracts and computer repair, weekly pay, potential job growth. Sounds good. Plus, I get to learn how to work on computers and do cellular phone contracts, both of which would be great skills to have in today's job market. I asked for the weekend to pray about it and visit with Bridget about it.

Day 21: Saturday
Eddie introduced his new book, Animal ABCs - A Book of Whimsy, today at the public library. Bear, Popeye, and I went to the library to hear Eddie read some from his book. It was a lot of fun, and we bought a book for kids. Eddie signed it, and the guys were excited. They like "Mr. Eddie."

Bridget went over to a friend's house to sew some curtains for them, and we all wound up spending most of the morning and early afternoon over there. They are good friends. We like them.

Well, the sewing motivated Bridget, so she got some new fabric and came home and sewed new curtains for our house! They look good, too. She then went to the Miss Altus pageant with my mom and sister. The kids and I stayed home and hung out.

Day 22: Sunday
More on this day in a later post.

Day 23: Monday
After talking with my wife, parents, friends, and God, we all decided that the job at Cellular Plus would be a great opportunity for me, so I went in today and told them I would take the job. Kathy, the store manager, was excited and a couple of the other guys tried to get me to start then and there. They actually wanted some time off, I think, but for now I'll go with they just really wanted me to be there.

During this stretch of time, I've been working on music, but I've got musician's block. If that is such a thing. Still walking with God through all this. I start next Monday at Cellular Plus; I wanted to finish this month of immersion. More to come...

"That Smells Stinkowith"*

I live in Oklahoma. I root for Oklahoma teams. I knew we were in trouble when we came away with zero points after two trips to the redzone. Plus, Tim Tebow is a darn good football player. And a believer. A passionate believer. However, that doesn't make all the hype about him before, during, and after the game any more tolerable for OU fans.

I didn't pay too much attention to it all. At least, I tried not to. But when all the announcers talked about was "Tebow this" or "Tebow that", then it became difficult to ignore. That particular sentiment was echoed by many Sooner fans in the days that followed the BCS Championship game. I heard plenty of, "Yeah, but did they have to keep talking about Tim Tebow?" Well, apparently they did.

The guy is good. He loves Jesus, and he's not afraid to tell you about it. If anybody deserves all the fuss about him, it's Tim Tebow. I like the guy. I don't know him personally, but I'd like to. Goodness oozes from him. Some would argue that greatness oozes from him. Victory seems to follow the guy around. For Florida and Tebow fans, you can't talk enough about him. For Oklahoma and Sam Bradford fans, you can't shut up fast enough. All the praise and hype for Tebow is sweet music for the Florida faithful and fingernails on a chalkboard for Sooner Nation.

Then, as I was pondering all of this, I was reminded about a particular passage of scripture. It comes from 2 Corinthians 2:14-16a, from the NIV:

14But thanks be to God, who always leads us in triumphal procession in Christ and through us spreads everywhere the fragrance of the knowledge of him. 15For we are to God the aroma of Christ among those who are being saved and those who are perishing. 16To the one we are the smell of death; to the other, the fragrance of life.

In a Roman victory procession, the Roman general would display the spoils of war, including any captives, amidst a cloud of incense burned for the gods. To the Romans, the victors, the smell was sweet, but to the captives, it was the stench of slavery and death. To the one, the smell was sweet victory, and to the other, it was bitter defeat.

As a believer, the message about Christ and his love and forgiveness smells sweet to me. But, I know for some, it stinks; they don't want to hear it. Even though it is a good message, a message of hope and mercy, there are some who don't want any of it. They would just as soon you shut up about it as to keep on and on about how good Jesus is.

Any of this making sense? Are you connecting the dots yet? I'm not saying that Tim Tebow is Jesus, nor am I calling Sooner fans unbelievers. But the illustration can be drawn. Losing to the Gators, and all the hooplah about Tebow, have put a practical case in point for me concerning this passage of scripture. Even though the Sooners lost, I sure am glad to be on the victorious side of Christ and smell that sweet aroma of his glory. Be encouraged.

Soli Deo Gloria

*(You might check the spelling on that word, but Star Wars fans will recognize that one from the mouth of Jar Jar Binks in Episode I)

A New Attitude

Breakthrough this morning! God always knows what you need. He knew what I needed, and he provided in a big, big way. Again, after hearing it, it may not be something completely new to you, as it is not new to me, but perhaps you'll see it in a different light, as I have.

Lately, I've been struggling. Mightily. If you've read any of my posts on any of my blogs, you know how I feel about worship. Worship is a lifestyle. It is a daily laying down of one's wants and desires to please the one, true God. Your life should be an act of worship before the Lord. However, in today's Amercian-ized, super-sized, mega-mall church, worship has become little more than singing some songs with a cool rock or pop band at weekly gatherings. We even call it "worship music". During the service, music is the "worship time". When, in actuality, giving of your time and resources, hearing the scriptures, praying for one another, and other "events" that take place during a "service", are all worshipful acts. So, music is not the end-all worship time. Here's my struggle:

Music is what I do. It's what Bridge and I do. It's who we are. It's what we believe is to be our tool to reach out to the church and to the lost and hurting. Music is a major thread of our life's garment. We want to make music that enhances a person's personal time of prayer and "worship". We want to create events or gatherings where music, prayer, healing, prophecy, teaching, and the move of the Spirit are regular, normal, and welcomed elements. (Kingdom Crossings - read the definition under the blog title)

Sunday mornings have been tough. We talk about worship being a lifestyle, but we push for more "worship" during the music. "Worship the Lord!" "Close your eyes and worship!" Both Bridge and I have had a hard time with this lately. We have felt like the emphasis is misplaced. It has made it difficult to really get "into it". Now, you'll have to understand that music as worship isn't all that seems out of place. There are other issues at hand here, some of which I have discussed earlier, and some of which we will discuss later. (None of these issues, for clarification, deal with our particular church on a specific level - all of our issues concern the American church as a whole, and therefore do not reflect any displeasure with any one person or persons at our particular church.) This touch of God, however, deals with the music.

I run the sound for our particular church. This morning, I was asked to lead in prayer before the praise team started rehearsing. I prayed for things that I have heard before, and know, but God had me take special note afterward of what I had prayed. I prayed for the music to become an extension of our life. I prayed that our lifestyle would reflect our attitude toward our God, and that this music would be an extension of that. After the prayer, I wrote this down:

We want our music to be an extension of our heart - an extension and expression

It was like God was saying, "Live a life of worship, and let your music become an extension of your life, and an expression of your heart. Let your life reflect your attitude toward me and my attitude toward you. Then, let your music reflect that."

I sang and expressed my heart with a lot more vigor this morning than I have in a long time. I didn't feel like I was "worshiping", but I was simply expressing what was in my heart for the Lord. It made singing the songs a lot easier. Maybe you already do that. Maybe you don't. Maybe you should. If you have trouble "worshiping" on Sunday mornings or Saturday nights, then try looking at it as an extension of your life and an expression of your heart. Don't let the semantics get in your way like I did. I won't anymore. I have a new attitude.

Soli Deo Gloria

God At Work

I know that God is very present in my life and constantly working in, and on, me. What's cool is seeing God work in others's lives, as well. This past Saturday night, I got to witness an awesome God experience.

Please note, as I tell this story, there may be issues that come up that you may disagree on with me, or that you don't necessarily believe. This is not a discussion on those topics; this a sharing of an amazing act of God in people's lives. We can discuss, debate, deal with, etc. these issues at a later time. For now, please allow God to encourage your spirit as he displays his glory in the following tale:

What started out to be a perfect, early January evening in southwest Oklahoma transformed into a cutting, cold blistery night in the matter of seconds. A wintry front blew in from the north with little warning, and everyone gathered around the outdoor fire suddenly clamored to get inside. A few brave souls fought the wind and the cold to put out the fire, and once they were safely inside, next to a simulated fire on the tv, the blustered bunch of believers began their bout with the Bible.

Ok, seriously, we were meeting together to eat and hang out and had to come inside because it got too cold outside. Then we started talking about what God was doing in each of our lives. We had two new couples at the gathering, so it was great to hear about their walks with God. After the elder of the two couples shared some things, my wife was moved to have the rest of the group pray over them. So, we did.

Iceman and Fiona* sat on our couch in the middle of the room while the rest of us gathered around them. Then we prayed. Good prayers for faith, strength, supernatural intervention, and the like were offered up. And they were offered in various languages. "Tongues" some people call it. It has become natural for several within the group to pray in such a way, but not everyone is familiar with, comfortable with, or understands praying in tongues. As was the case with Iceman.

After praying over this wonderful couple, we all sat back down when the other new couple, Maverick and Ariel, spoke up. You could tell that it wasn't easy for him, but he asked if any of us had ever had our "tongues" interpreted. Um, no. Of course, I thought that was odd, because I didn't realize that my "prayer language" should or could be interpreted. Maverick quickly teared up, because he was trying to be obedient to the Lord telling him to tell us what we had said in our prayer. Thus, he continued.

He told us that I was saying over and over, "Praise be to God!" To another in the group, she was saying, "Jesus is in control!" Wow. How cool is that? To have God tell you what you were saying to him in the "deep calling deep!" Maverick said that God has anointed him with the gift of interpretation, but he hasn't always used it when he felt God prompting him. So he was taking a big step that night to speak in front of strangers in obedience to God. Major move of Messiah in Maverick's life.

After Maverick spoke, and we all were trying get over the coolness of that, Iceman spoke up. He described how, while we were praying, and he heard us praying in "tongues," he told God that if this was real, we wanted an interpretation. Um, double wow. He went on to explain how he had had two very negative experiences with "tongues" and those who "spoke" them. He said he had a very large mountain in his life pertaining to this topic, and Maverick had completely crumbled it. (still get goosebumps thinking about it) Iceman said that if he hadn't received an interpretation, that the mountain would've only grown.

Well, Maverick gave God the glory for bringing down the mountain, and Iceman agreed. But Iceman also told him that if he hadn't been obedient, that the mountain would probably still be there. To add to the validity of it all, the words being prayed were ones that spoke directly into Iceman's life and situations for this particular season. God is so good. He moves in unexpected ways. We were all pretty stoked from seeing God at work in the lives of our new brothers and sisters in Christ. For me, God fulfilled his promise in Matthew 18:20 -

"For where two or three come together in my name, there am I with them."

And where he is, the Kingdom can be crossed.

Soli Deo Gloria

*names have been changed to protect the innocent (and not so innocent)

My "Ah-ha" Moment

We all have them at some point or another. That moment when suddenly all the planets align, two and two actually make four, and everything fits into place. Last night, I had one such moment. Once you read it, you may not think it to be very earth-shaking, but for me, it all made perfect sense.

At our Life Group's meeting last night, Proverbs 19:8 was presented and discussed. From the TEV it says,

Do yourself a favor and learn all you can; then remember what you learn and you will prosper.

From the Message:

Grow a wise heart-you'll do yourself a favor; keep a clear head-you'll find a good life.

The question: "What is something you enjoy learning about, and how can it benefit other people?"

My thoughts: You know, I really enjoy reading the Bible and learning new insights about what the Lord has to say and is saying to me. Wait..do I really? It's hard and tedious to read, research, look up, write down, and prepare for a sermon. I really don't enjoy that at all. But I do enjoy just reading and suddenly being interrupted by God. That is quite fulfilling. I like to write down what he says to me in those moments. And it is a heck of a lot easier to prepare from notes I've already taken. Plus, I have a better time communicating something God has taught me for my sake and my life, than to try to communicate something I know but am not really experiencing or have experienced. Interesting...

My notes: When I try to read and learn in order to teach people, it becomes hard and tedious. When I read to learn for my own sake, it comes much easier, and I hear God speak so much more clearly.

Ah-ha!: Well, whaddya know?! While in "ministry," I was always reading and learning more so that I could teach others what I think they need to know. But that came with great difficulty. When I learn for my own benefit, I then am armed with insight and blessings for others. Go figure. I was always trying too hard to go in the wrong direction. The scriptures say to "love others as you love yourself." When I love myself enough to learn more and better my spiritual journey, it can then benefit others.

While I was having those thoughts last night, God reminded me of Psalm 51. Perhaps you know verses 10-12:

10 Create in me a clean heart, O God,
and put a new and right spirit within me.
11 Do not cast me away from your presence,
and do not take your holy spirit from me.
12 Restore to me the joy of your salvation,
and sustain in me a willing spirit. (NRSV)

Long ago when I was memorizing those verses, God had verse 13 stand out to me, as well:

13 Then I will teach transgressors your ways,
and sinners will return to you.

In other words, after I seek God on my behalf, I will have what I need to teach others his ways. Thanks, God, for that little mile marker on this road while crossing the Kingdom.

Soli Deo Gloria

Crossing On Faith

In my attempt to journey through the Kingdom, I have entered a new valley. It is a dark valley for the moment. I cannot see what is ahead or around me, and I know that I can't go back in the direction from whence I came. Even that is starting to fade, and frankly, it's a little scary.

During my last year, year and half, in Montgomery, TX, the 23rd Psalm took on new meaning for me. Generally used for comfort during times of great grief, namely deaths, I found great hope in exploring all of its implications. Honestly, I owe that to my pastor at the time, Dowen. He helped point out a lot of significance this passage of scripture had for my life. As I started writing this post this morning, the passage was brought back to mind, so I re-read it. From the NRSV:

The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want.
He makes me lie down in green pastures;
he leads me beside still waters;
he restores my soul.
He leads me in right paths
for his name's sake.

Even though I walk through the darkest valley,
I fear no evil;
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff -
they comfort me.

You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies;
you anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me
all the days of my life,
and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord
my whole life long.

I ended 2008 with a full time job (albeit one that didn't pay every bill, but it paid most of them) and a part time job. I begin 2009 with 4 part time jobs. Right now, I'll only be getting paid for 3 of them, but that 4th one is what I know God wants me to do. So. Dark valley? I can't see a heck of a whole lot. Bright horizon? More than you and I can imagine!

While I know God is walking me through this particular valley (like he does every valley) he doesn't promise a peaceful valley. While he promises to be there, to give peace and comfort and rest, the valley and the journey aren't going to be easy. That's why it's called a dark valley or the valley of the shadow of death - not very pleasant imagery.

However, this I know: the other side of this valley will be like a land flowing with milk and honey! While I desperately already want to be on the other side, I know that I've got to journey through this. It's in the journey that God reveals his glory, and I don't want to miss it. What started the idea for this particular post came from Ephesians.

As someone was praying over us recently, he said that it was important to daily put on the full armor of God. So, after reading that passage again, I came across verse 18 of chapter 6:

Pray in the Spirit at all times in every prayer and supplication. To that end keep alert and always persevere in supplication for all the saints.
Pray also for me, so that when I speak, a message may be given to me to make known with boldness the mystery of the gospel, for which I am an ambassador in chains. Pray that I may declare it boldly, as I must speak.

That is my request of you. Pray for me. I may not be in chains, but I am to be an ambassador. So, "I must speak". "Pray that I may declare it boldly." And pray that I may learn what I need to learn, so that this valley isn't necessarily a long one, but one that bears much fruit for the Kingdom. After all, that's all I'm doing - journeying through the Kingdom. Crossing on faith.

Soli Deo Gloria
R.C.

"What I tell you in the dark..."

"What I tell you in the dark, speak in the daylight; what is whispered in your ear, proclaim from the roofs." - Jesus (Matthew 10:27 NIV)

I read from Matthew 10, verses 16 through 42 this morning, and the above verse caught my attention the most. There were others that pricked my ears and heart this morning, and you'll hear about them a little later, but for some reason, this one really struck a chord. I think, partly, because I can't find any commentary on that verse. It comes in the middle of a paragraph of scripture that has produced more studying than this little verse. But, for whatever reason, God was speaking this to me this morning.

I believe it implies a quiet time. For me, it is early in the morning when it is still dark. I also believe it implies an intimate relationship with the Son (and Father and Spirit), as he will whisper in my ear. I think it can also be indicative of the relationship between Christ and his bride (us - the church).

While this verse speaks of relationship and time together with Christ, it is also obviously a call to action. We are to share what we learn from our saviour. First, we are to spend time, in private (in the dark/whispered in your ear), with him, then we publicly (in daylight/from the roofs) share what he told us. So, today, start to spend time with your Lord, in private, in the dark, and allow him to whisper in your ear, and then share that good news with others. Be encouraged.

Soli Deo Gloria

The Narrow Gate

This morning's reading was in Matthew chapter 7. At first glance, these scriptures seam like two different teachings. God tied them together for me this morning.

"Enter through the narrow gate; for the gate is wide and the road is easy that leads to destruction, and there are many who take it. For the gate is narrow and the road is hard that leads to life, and there are few who find it.
"Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep's clothing but inwardly are ravenous wolves. You will know them by their fruits. Are grapes gathered from thorns, or figs from thistles? In the same way, every good tree bears good fruit, but the bad tree bears bad fruit. A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, nor can a bad tree bear good fruit. Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire. Thus you will know them by their fruits." - Matthew 7:13-20 NRSV

For the past few days I have been struggling with being a "professional talker." You know, someone who is considered an "expert" in whatever field, because he/she talks a lot about it, writes a lot about it, puts on seminars or conferences a lot about it, sings songs a lot about it, etc. a lot about it. Not that anyone considers me an expert on anything. I was referring to different people I see on TV or hear on the radio or read on the internet.

I can talk about being a believer all I want. I can talk about reaching out to the lost, helping the poor, feeding the hungry. I can say that a believer should do that everyday. I can talk about living a life pleasing to God; I can sing about living a life pleasing to God; I can blog about living a life pleasing to God. But, am I? This passage really convicted me this morning. Where's my fruit? Am I bearing fruit? Can I make jelly from it? (Jesus Jelly?)

Then I realized that to be a true teacher or prophet, and to bear fruit with my life, that it takes actually entering through the narrow gate and traveling down the hard road. I often ask myself, "Why do things have to be so hard?" Well, the answer is because that is the road that leads to life. Oh. The light's a little brighter this morning. I want to be one of the few who find that road. I want to enter the narrow gate. I want others to come with me. Will you?

Enter the Fight: Round 2

I know it's been a while. I'm sorry. I've been struggling with a lot of stuff for the past few weeks. Sure, I've been busy, but more than that, I've been trying to get over the fact that I may have really missed something at the men's retreat.

Remember this post? Yeah, well, I thought I had that figured out, too. What I wrote was part of the word the Lord had for me, but it was really more of a personal warning, or a personal call to action: Enter the fight! It was a word for the me entering the men's retreat. And I missed it.

Ron DePriest was great. His messages were stirring, and God was moving, and I really got a lot out of it. Appreciated it. Good stuff. That part was spot on. The rest of the time, well, that's where I feel like I missed it.

Thursday night: I was tired. I'd been up since 4:30, had driven for a little over 2 hours, it was 10 o'clock at night; I was tired. An extremely good friend of mine, Chenson (names have been changed to protect the innocent), and I hadn't eaten, yet. So, we went with Poby to get some dinner. We got back sometime between 11 and 11:30. Quite understandably, I was ready for bed. I had the privilege of rooming with another of my extremely good friends, Poby. However, we had several people come to our room, and after they finally left, Pob and I got our guitars out and actually wrote a song using some words from another song I had and several of our notes from the evening's session. Great stuff! We were up till around 3, I think. Around 6, I get a call from work. I was on the phone twice with them for a total of 45 minutes. Luckily, the first session wasn't until 10, but still, bed late + up early = not a good combo.

Friday: I was tired. Another great session. Poby, Chenson, and I were going to take the afternoon free time to get me registered to vote, get Chenson a GPS for his wife's car, and come back and hang out with the rest of the fellas. Well, we wound up going with Estevie to Guitar Center in OKC. I did get registered to vote, we did get Chenson's GPS, but we got back just in time for dinner. No time spent with other guys (outside my usual "circle of friends"), the pastor, nor the speaker. Not a problem, we still had Friday night.

Friday night: Over by 9-ish. Another great session. More great stuff. So great, in fact, I found Poby afterward and told him I thought we had more writing to do. We went back to the room, pulled out the guitars, and started writing again. A few guys came through. We talked a lot about different stuff. Good time with Poby and with Chenson. Went to bed around midnight-ish (I think). Again, no time spent with the leadership.

Saturday morning: Skip breakfast and show up for the morning's session; the last one. Suddenly I'm hit with the feeling that I've completely missed out on something I was supposed to get. I didn't know what. I still don't. I just had knots in my stomach all morning long. What did I miss? Then the words came floating back into mind: Enter the fight. Had I entered the fight all weekend? I don't know. Suddenly, what was a fun weekend turned into a stressful, spiritual debate. What had I gotten out of the weekend? A song? More time with great guys I already spend a lot of time with? Had I served anybody throughout the weekend? Therein lied my answer. NO.

Realization: I had taken all weekend. Oh, sure, I ran the words for worship every session but the first, I went with Estevie (also a good friend, btw) to Guitar Center, listened to Poby and Chenson, but I never sacrificed anything all weekend. I never helped in the kitchen. I never took out the trash. I never helped any other guy with any other thing all weekend. I never did anything that I didn't want to do. It was a completely selfish weekend. Not the trait of a servant-leader. If that's the kind of leader I want to be, then I completely blew my chance that weekend. That is what I missed, and that is what felt so horrible.

Clarification: I LOVED hanging out with Pobias and Chenson. Always do. In fact, the song Pob and I wrote, we sang in church that Sunday. Our worship team is going to pick it up. Exciting stuff! I cherish that time we got to spend together. I know that was part of what God wanted me to get out of the weekend. I just wish I had taken extra time to seek out the leadership, to give to other guys, and entered the entire fight. You know, get everything God has for me.

So, my encouragement to you comes from Isaiah 55:6-9

6 Seek the Lord while you can find him. Call on him now while he is near. 7 Let the wicked change their ways and banish the very thought of doing wrong. Let them turn to the Lord that he may have mercy on them. Yes, turn to our God, for he will
forgive generously.
8 “My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts,” says the Lord. “And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine. 9 For just as the heavens are higher than the
earth, so my ways are higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your
thoughts.

Just because you think you've got God figured out doesn't mean that you do. Seek Him. Ask Him. Be encouraged. Enter the fight.

Soli Deo Gloria

Enter the Fight

ACF opens its staff prayer time in the morning to the congregation on Tuesdays through Fridays. The theater (which we own and in which we meet) isn't but a couple of blocks from where I work, so I walk to prayer when I can make it. Lately, I've been able to go 3 or 4 times a week.

Yesterday, walking to prayer, these words flashed through my mind:

"Enter the Fight"

I was already a little jazzed from a morning espresso, but I was just overall excited about things. Our men's retreat is coming up this weekend, Bridge and I are doing "the special" on Sunday, and I had just successfully arranged a rehearsal with some of what I'm going to call Kingdom Band to play the song on Sunday, too. So, I had a few things going my way.

"Enter the Fight"

Ok, so a few thoughts: I didn't figure God was wanting me to pick a fight with someone; I knew that "our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms" (Eph. 6:12), and, at the time, I felt it meant by singing a song I had written. You know, I was entering the fight with a tool or weapon that I had made.

Then, we started to pray. God immediately revealed a whole new world of warfare to me. This was the fight to which He was referring. Believe it or not, prayer is spiritual warfare. God calls us all to enter the fight. We enter the fight by hitting our knees. (How many of you actually hit your knees, or kneel, while praying?)

We also enter the fight in other ways. Singing, writing, painting, building, using your gifts for His glory are all ways to enter the fight. How many of you have been moved by a song, a poem, a good book, a piece of art or photograph, a magnificent structure? Inspiration, conviction, love, mercy - these come from godly things. Condemnation, hatred - these come from ungodly things.

So, you who are prayer warriors; you who are writers, artists, musicians, craftsmen, enter the fight! Stand up and be counted. Remember, "for though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds." (2 Cor. 10:3-4)

Your songs may not be sung nor heard by everybody, but you don't stop writing or singing; your books may not be read by everyone, but you don't stop writing; your hand-made jewelry may not be worn by every person, but you don't stop making it. To someone, somewhere, your gifts make a difference. God gets the glory, and that is always a good thing. "Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power." (Eph. 6:10)

Soli Deo Gloria

Wake Up Call

This morning, I checked up on some blogs that finally posted after a few days absence. I also checked out Tall Skinny Kiwi's blog on the "10 Commandments of Blogging." I then read his previous post, and was suddenly awakened to a side of the world I usually choose to ignore. It's not pretty.

The IDOP (International Day of Prayer) is coming up November 16. While our nation needs prayer, so do these guys. Check out the web site OpenDoors.

"You cannot pray for revival for one half of the body of Christ while forgetting
the other half which is suffering under restrictions." - Brother Andrew

I don't know who Brother Andrew is, but he is so right. Our praise team worked on a new/old song last night. It talks about hearing God speak and "oh, this changes everything." Yes it does.

Soli Deo Gloria

Hold Fast

Words of encouragement and a MercyMe song. Really great song. I actually play it quite often on KQ106. I first heard the song a year ago. Then, back in December, I came across this verse:

"The Lord your God you shall follow, him alone you shall fear, his commandments you shall keep, his voice you shall obey, him you shall serve, and to him you shall hold fast." Deut. 13:4

Great verse, isn't it? I have it written down in three or four different places. Then, a little over a month ago, I came across this little gem in Isaiah:

"You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you.
Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord, the Lord, is the Rock eternal." Isaiah 26:3-4

For whatever reason, God wanted me to share these verses with you. Be encouraged. He is with you; He is for you. Hold fast.

My Sacrifice

It's a Creed song. But that's not the point of this post. As I've mentioned before, my alarm goes off at 4am. Notice how I always say that my alarm goes off then, and not that I get up then. A couple, ten presses of the ole snooze button allows me some extra sleep. I'm usually out of bed by 4:30.

My morning routine consists of bathroom time, batcave time, bathroom time and leaving. Sometimes, I sneak a breakfast time in there, but not very often. It's just hard for me to eat at 4:30/5 in the morning. Besides, I'm usually hungry again around 10-ish.

My batcave time consists of Bible time, blog time, between-God-and-me time (you knew I had to keep the whole "b" thing going) and body building time. That sounds grand, but it's usually just some push-ups and sit-ups. The only thing really consistent in the the batcave time is the between-God-and-me time. I hit the rest most of the time, but some mornings I may spend more time in the Bible and not get to blog, or vice versa, or I won't build my body, or whatever.

My morning routine seems to get easier everyday. It's still not easy. But it has come a long way from whence I started. I fought God on it for a long time. It's just very, very early. My turning point came one morning (before I started writing down stuff) as I was doing my sit-ups. I remember laying on the floor and asking God why it has to be so hard. You know? I was tired; I was trying to do sit-ups; I wanted to be back in bed. Why are things so hard, God?

"It wouldn't be a sacrifice if it was easy."

Whoa. You answered me? I'm sacrificing for You right now? Talk about an attitude change. Here I was thinking I was just going through some tough times, and God saw it for what it really is. It's a season. And, during this particular season, some sacrifices have to be made. So, me getting up every morning to have my time alone with God is a sacrifice. You know, Psalms talks about bringing the "sacrifice of praise." And look at Romans 12:1

"I appeal to you therefore, brothers and sisters, by the mercies of God, to
present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is
your spiritual worship."

Even now, what can I say? My early morning hours are an act of spiritual worship to the creator of the universe. I'm sure it's much sweeter to His ears now. I don't gripe and complain nearly as much as I used to.

What is your act of spiritual worship? Is God asking you to sacrifice anything right now? Remember, it's a season; seasons change. God is here, lovingly walking you through this time, and He's already in the next season lovingly waiting for you. Are you kicking and screaming your way through this time? I was. Maybe it would help if you could see it for what it is. A season. A season of sacrifice. Your living sacrifice; your spiritual worship. Be encouraged.

Soli Deo Gloria

No More Sleepy Prayers

This morning came early. Of course, when bed comes late, morning tends to do that. SLEEEEEPY! I know I have a long day ahead of me. Usually, I have a chance at a nap around lunch time, but today I have a remote from 1 to 4, so no nap today. Early bed is a possibility. We'll see how it goes.

My only option then is to completely rely on God. So, I pray. "God be my strength, and my sustenance. Be my joy, and give me energy for the day." Oh, it is very easy to lay my head down on my desk and snooze for another 30 minutes, or so. But, I know that God wants to meet with me. And I want to meet with Him.

So, I read a little; I pray a little. I read a little, I pray a little. I don't close my eyes - that could be dangerous. I look at things I've written down over the past couple of days (which is quite a bit, actually). I start searching through my notes: several ideas for blogs, or lessons, or sermons, or something. I start looking up different scripture, like a treasure hunt. I start praying in the spirit. I suddenly find myself awake and not near as sleepy. The Lord has given me strength and energy for this morning meeting. Don't get me wrong, I could go back to sleep pretty easily. But the trick now is I don't want to go back to sleep.

The past few times I've had the privilege to pray with a group of people have been interesting. One meeting, I walked in after they had already started praying, and the room was quiet. At first, I was afraid I had missed an ominous announcement or something. The prayers seemed timid; everything lacked punch or enthusiasm, or something. God was stirring in me. I didn't want to come in with some big, boisterous prayer, but I felt God was wanting more out of what was going on. So, I started quietly, but then allowed the Spirit to build up. I kept hearing, "Wake up! Wake up! Wake up! Wake up! Be alert! Be alert! Be ready! Be ready!" I could tell as I was praying, that the Spirit started moving among the others. It was as if new life had been breathed into the soul of our prayer time.

Just a few days later, I had a similar experience. The first couple of people to pray prayed long, relatively boring prayers. Had I kept my eyes closed, I would have fallen asleep. I know this because I suddenly jerked up after a couple of minutes of "meditation." Embarrassed, I opened my eyes and looked around to see if anybody noticed. Satisfied, that I wouldn't undergo any significant ridicule for sleeping through prayer time, I decided I better keep my eyes open. In fact, I got up and started walking around. Again, I could hear the words, "Wake up! Be ready!"

So, I wrote this down: Do I have a blood lust? What is this desire to wage war on the enemy? This passion? This burning, yearning for more - NO MORE SLEEPY PRAYERS! Wake up! Be alert! Jesus is coming!

Oh, I really want to press in to God. Press in to the things He has for us. Jesus is preparing a place for his bride; His bride (us, the church) should be preparing for his return! We don't want to be found asleep and unprepared do we? I sure don't. Wake up, church! No more sleepy prayers!

Father, help us to find the balance between this passion for more and the rest we find in Your tenderness. Your love is amazing, and Your grace is sufficient. Wake us up. No more sleepy prayers.

An Interesting Twist

In going over my message this last Sunday, God gave me what I thought was a pretty clever (and dead-on) quote. I was just feeling a burden for the church. Not just my parent's church, but the body of Christ as a whole. In praying over it, this is what came to mind:

"Our faith fails when we forget how much we're favored by the Father."

WE are his chosen, treasured, special, personal possession! How quickly and often we forget that. God's people, the Hebrews, forgot that rather easily, too. The exodus from Egypt to the Promised Land is rife with grumbling, complaining, whining, and turning away from God. The theme of forgetting continues through the New Testament. The pharisees are prime examples of people who had absolutely no memory of God's favor for his people.

Later in the afternoon, the thought was developed a little more.

"Our fear is fueled, and our faith fails when we forget how much the Father favors us."

Quick, little example: Peter, walking on water, focuses more on the waves than on Jesus, his fear takes over, his faith falls, and he starts to sink. Now, side note, he is the only one to have stepped out of the boat, so props for Peter, there. God couldn't show his favor (love, mercy, grace) any better than by sending his only begotten son, Jesus Christ to die for us while we were yet sinners. He not only loves us, he likes us.

Now, here's the twist. This morning whilst praying, it hit me - this is not just a word for the church - it's a PERSONAL WORD.

Whoa.

God just wanted to remind me, that I am treasured by the Most High God. My own faith fails, and my own fears are fueled, whenever I forget that the Father will never forsake me. I even had a word spoken over me back in March dealing with the same thing. Here's a clip of what Paul Costa had to say:


Interesting twist, huh? Be encouraged.

Hearing God Speak

It's really a humbling event. It doesn't matter when, where, or how, it always gets me. There's a song with the lyrics, "Left my fears by the side of the road/hear You speak/won't let go". That's how I feel. Once I hear God speak, it won't let go of me. So, I have to make this latest conversation real for me. You know, before the enemy tries to convince me that I didn't hear correctly.

Yesterday, on the way back from Taco Bell with food for my wife and parents, I drove past one of the local EMS stations. An ambulance pulled out with lights flashing and sirens blaring, followed by an EMS truck. Moved to say a prayer for the wisdom and skills of the EMTs to help save a life, emotions started welling up inside of me.

Earlier this year, I had a prophetic word spoken over me, and in it God said that he had given me his mind - that I had a brilliant mind.

So, I said, "Father, You have given me your mind, would it be too much to ask for your heart also? You ask for my heart and mind, can I not have both your heart and mind?"

"I gave my life for you. Will you give me yours?"

I drove on. What a question. More emotions.

"Father, I give You my life. All I have is yours. I give you my
heart, my mind, my life - it's yours. Whatever You want."

"Preach for me."

Tears. "One more time; I don't want to miss it."

"Preach for me."

By this time, I'm doing everything I can to keep from looking like I'm having an emotional break down inside my car. Even now, the emotions fight their way out. I am Yours, O God.

"Preach for me."

Wow.

When I delivered the food to my parents house, I tried to wipe away the tears before entering, because I didn't want my mother to think that getting Taco Bell for them was a distressful time for me.

Long ago, I started in youth ministry. Always wanted to preach. Always wanted to pastor my own church. (birth)

As time wore on, that desire evolved. I started saying things like, "I know I'm called to ministry, but I don't know what kind of ministry." Eventually, after 10+ years in "the ministry", I left. I knew it was time to not be on staff at a church for awhile. (death)

I'm in radio. I enjoy it most of the time. I help with the sound at the church. I've got a group of buddies with whom we hang out and discuss God things. In fact, we just went camping to hang out with God this weekend. Then, unexpectedly, God shows up on the way home from Taco Bell.

"Preach for me." (resurrection)

Will you help me pray this through? I understand that preaching for God is not necessarily the same as pastoring a church. I've also had apostolic words spoken over me, by the way, so I know that there are a plethora of ways to preach for God. (bonus points to those of you who immediately thought of The Three Amigos when you read the word plethora)

Thank you for praying. Thank you for listening (reading). It's life changing... It's humbling... Hearing God speak.

How Much More

Abundantly. That's the best answer I could come up with for Jesus' question. See, my wife and my mother LOOOVE HGTV. When we had cable, at our house, we had 5 channels we switched between: NickJr. and Disney for the kids, TBS for me (when TBS was cool and airing Braves baseball games), and HGTV and TLC for the wife. OK, make it 6. Throw the Food Network in there, too.

One thing bothers me a little about watching so much HGTV. Granted, other channels, including my beloved TBS, has this problem too, but we watch a lot of HGTV, so I shall pick on them. So much programming surrounding homosexual couples. Hear me. It is simply the lifestyle that bothers me. Plus, the gay men HGTV, and others, put on tv seem, well, gay. I'm sure these are fabulous people, but their lifestyle is in direct opposition to God. This is not my point.

This is: "If [we] then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts,... how much more will the heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!" Luke 11:13 NRSV

See, tonight on Deserving Design With Vern Yip, two female roommates received a new home office and guest room. I don't know if they were gay. Unfortunately, anymore, one assumes they are before finding out. Two women, living together, on HGTV... That's not the point.

This is: Their sexual preferences aside, it got me to thinking about how much God loves us. The purpose of these shows is to give someone a blessing. Be it a new kitchen, bathroom, whatever. Houses are remodeled and redesigned, and the recipients are usually ecstatic. So, take a homosexual couple, their lifestyle in direct opposition to God, they still receive a blessing. A new this; a remodeled that. I know the couple doesn't have to be homosexual to be in sin. We don't always know if and when we see the ones who are having an affair on their spouse, or the ones who cheat at work, or the ones who are in to drugs and alcohol, and so and so forth.

As I was watching this show, God just spoke the following verse to me.
Matthew 7:11If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him! (NIV)

Luke 11:13If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!" (NIV)

I really don't think the two women were "a couple". Just roommates. But the point remains the same. If we who are evil, homosexual, alcoholic, abusive, promiscuous, deceiving, etc, can give good gifts to those who are also evil, then how much more will the Father, who is not evil by the way, give to us who ask!

Luke 11:9-10 (Amplified Bible)
9So I say to you, Ask and [a]keep on asking and it shall be given you; seek and [b]keep on seeking and you shall find; knock and [c]keep on knocking and the door shall be opened to you.
10For everyone who asks and [d]keeps on asking receives; and he who seeks and [e]keeps on seeking finds; and to him who knocks and [f]keeps on knocking, the door shall be opened.

So, if those who are living in sin can be blessed in such a way, how much more does God want to bless those who are actually trying to live for him. How much more will he bless those who chase after him? Why don't we take hold of that more often? Can you imagine how much more? How much more!

"Meet with me..."

What?
"Meet with me."
When? Now? In the morning?
"Both."
Really?
"Meet with me."

I heard it plain as day. At 11:15 at night. My alarm goes off at 4 in the morning. I have to be at work sometime between 5:30 and 6. 11:15 is late. I know that 10:15 is only an hour earlier, but 11:15 is late. "Meet with me."

OK.
Matt. 19:26. Nothing.
Mark 6:4-6. Nothing.
Lord, I don't know what You want from me right now. Nothing's making any sense.
"Write me a song."
It's late.
"Write me a song."
About what? What kind of song?
"Write me a song."

Anybody else notice I'm not the only stubborn one here? I pull down my guitar.

Give me the words, Lord.
You made the stars....that twinkle....that shine....that burn at night...so bright.
Give me the chords, Lord. Please. Give me the music.
You made this heart...that beats for You...so true...for You...

An hour later:

You made the stars
that burn at night, so bright
You made this heart
that beats for You, for You
You made the wind
that blows through the trees, gentle breeze
You made this soul
that basks in Your glory, Your glory

Your Glory shines brighter than the sun
You're the Holy One
Who was, and is, and is to come
You're the Holy One
The Holy One

You made the seas
that crash into shore, hear them roar
You made these hands
that clap for You, it's all for You
You made the men
who crucified Your son, Your only son
You made Your son
who comes in Your glory, Your glory

Your Glory shines brighter than the sun
You're the Holy One
Who was, and is, and is to come
You're the Holy One
The Holy One

I did not make the morning meeting. I'm sorry, Lord. I will make tomorrow's. Grant me grace to do so. Meet with me.